The Presidential Election

Should I endorse a candidate? Perhaps, perhaps not. What does anyone care what this one, lonely interloper thinks? I am but a construct of the mind, useless to the real world.

I feel, though, as if I must. However, the candidates are so atrocious that they make me want to vomit on my sweater already.

First, we have John McCain - the crazy old man who wants to bomb Iran. I imagine it would be a cross between making these two men President:


Then we have Hillary Clinton, the Marie Antoinette of this race. Not just for the let them eat cake attitude that she hides behind her faux-working class credentials as a beer and shot kind of gal, but also for being the wife of the modern day Louis XVI, Bill Clinton. Of course, instead of being followed by a Great Revolution Clinton was folllowed by the Revolution of the Neo-Conservatives and Oil Millionaires who have reshaped society to their own ends. Also, Marie Antoinette liked speculating in pork futures. Sorry guys, that joke might have been over the line. Anyway, if that whore of capitalism pulls the TeleCom's dicks out of her mouth long enough to string together a coherent sentence, perhaps she could top Barack Obama. Then again, this could happen too.



And finally, we have the supposed front runner, Barack Obama. At times, I admit, I like him. And the thought of a black President would send so many racists into such a tizzy that I assume they would shit their pants. However, I must remind myself that he is the kinder, gentler face of American fascism. To paraphrase John Lennon, he could be like the folks on the hill. But first he must learn to smile as he kills. Of course, for the Democrats, this is a moot point, as what he is doing to Hillary is akin to this:


Alas, they are all imperialist swine. Despite what I do, my prediction is that the American working class will end up like Mojo.

The Chinese/Belgian/Capitalism Tripartite Alliance Against The Purity of Sports

Well, as per usual, I enjoyed taking some time away from work today to flip through the mouthpiece for the British ruling class: The Financial Times. I was greeted with a story that hit me like a Rick James slap across the face. Supposedly, Jacques Rogge, head of the International Olympic Committee, has told the west to stop hectoring China over their massive human rights violations.

HA HA HA

Jacques Rogge is about as despicable a pig as the laboratory concocted spawn of Alexander Kolchak and Kenesaw Mountain Landis which I believe he is. Rogge, who was knighted by the Grand Inquisitor of Belgian Imperialism “King” Albert II, has one primary mission: helping divert the international class struggle into the mindless idiocy of nationalism. His special portfolio is, I believe, Minister of Sport for the Department of Diverting The International Proletariat Struggle. Athletes should be banding together to form teams based upon class lines – pitting the best of the proletariat versus the weak ass teams the bourgeoisie would be able to put together. I’ve constructed a starting lineup for Team Proletariat. Check it out:

C – Victor Martinez. Bonus points for being from Venezuela.

1B – Ryan Howard. Grew up in Missouri, notorious for poor people.

2B – Robinson Cano. Maintains the struggle through honoring Jackie Robinson, a fighter in the class struggle.

SS – Jimmy Rollins. Straight out of Oakland.

3B – Travis Hafner. Has always reminded me of a Southern Cesar Chavez. Had to move him to third-base as this is a notoriously imperialist position. Thanks George Brett.

LF – Adam Dunn. A true Hero of the Working Man. This is who John Edwards wishes he was.

CF – Coco Crisp. Obviously.

RF – Bobby Abreu. Again, a soldier in the Venezuelan Revolution.

P – Jamie Shields.

Compare this to the weakness of Team Bourgeoisie.

Team Bourgeoisie

C – Joe Mauer.

1B – Ken Caminiti.

2B – Chase Utley, however, he is a class traitor and will side with us.

3B – Ryan Zimmerman. Obviously.

SS – Davis Love III.

LF – Shawn Green. Obviously.

CF – Mark Kotsay.

RF – Chris Dodd.

P – Roger Clemens, The Great Satan of American Capitalism.

Who would you go to war with? I think its obvious who you would go to class war with.

And yet, Jacques Rogge – or Jacques Rogue, I should call him – wants to prevent this and instead force us all into competing for the capitalist oppressors who deign to call themselves our national leaders. Although I am an expert golfer, even if golf was in the Olympics I would not choose to compete for the flag of the oppressor nation in which I reside and instead would use my mighty 4 iron to strike down those who control the means of production and exploit us. Of course golf is not in the Olympics. And neither is baseball. And who is responsible for removing baseball? Jacques Rogue (remember, that’s what I renamed him).

Well, this Flemish sack of shit should go back to the Walloon whorehouse where his mother gave birth to him and keep his nose out of sport. Instead, he has now taken upon himself the duty of being Chief Apologist for Chinese Stalinist Oppression. Oh no Jacques, is the rising up of the working class to protest these atrocities too much for you? Then I assume when we rise up to seize the commanding heights of the economy it shall also be too much for you. The sight of millions of workers marching, arm in arm, to your Ivory Tower to tear your entrails out shall make you shit your pants. And even that will be more entertaining than watching the farce/sham which you pass off as the Olympic Games.

Onward to the Dictatorship of the Proletariat!

Also, check out this awesome video of Asdrubal Cabrera.