Sunday, April 27, 2008

The Presidential Election

Should I endorse a candidate? Perhaps, perhaps not. What does anyone care what this one, lonely interloper thinks? I am but a construct of the mind, useless to the real world.

I feel, though, as if I must. However, the candidates are so atrocious that they make me want to vomit on my sweater already.

First, we have John McCain - the crazy old man who wants to bomb Iran. I imagine it would be a cross between making these two men President:


Then we have Hillary Clinton, the Marie Antoinette of this race. Not just for the let them eat cake attitude that she hides behind her faux-working class credentials as a beer and shot kind of gal, but also for being the wife of the modern day Louis XVI, Bill Clinton. Of course, instead of being followed by a Great Revolution Clinton was folllowed by the Revolution of the Neo-Conservatives and Oil Millionaires who have reshaped society to their own ends. Also, Marie Antoinette liked speculating in pork futures. Sorry guys, that joke might have been over the line. Anyway, if that whore of capitalism pulls the TeleCom's dicks out of her mouth long enough to string together a coherent sentence, perhaps she could top Barack Obama. Then again, this could happen too.



And finally, we have the supposed front runner, Barack Obama. At times, I admit, I like him. And the thought of a black President would send so many racists into such a tizzy that I assume they would shit their pants. However, I must remind myself that he is the kinder, gentler face of American fascism. To paraphrase John Lennon, he could be like the folks on the hill. But first he must learn to smile as he kills. Of course, for the Democrats, this is a moot point, as what he is doing to Hillary is akin to this:


Alas, they are all imperialist swine. Despite what I do, my prediction is that the American working class will end up like Mojo.

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